"I was disillusioned with television" - Ayub Khan

He is perhaps the only man in telllydom who can boast of being the sidekick of the most powerful women (Madhuri Will his new serial raise a storm? Ayub Khan with Simone Singh in Zee's Aandhi Dixit and Karisma Kapoor) on screen --- be it on television or on the big screen. Ayub Khan is back on television after a hiatus --- he will be soon seen playing unfaithful hubby to Simone Singh on Ravi Rai's Kashish to be aired on Zee TV soon. He has no qualms in admitting that he has led a corrupt life and he is continually in an effort to gain sensibilities that would give him a better perspective of life. In a candid interview with Ananya Sengupta, Ayub speaks about television and how he almost quit the medium. How was it working with Ravi Rai? I had a very different picture of him in my mind. I thought he would be a very serious person…but you should see him on the sets, he has everyone in splits. Understanding human emotions comes so easily to him that I am amazed. He is a very perceptive person. I need that kind of a person to guide me, otherwise left to myself, I would never succeed. That I think is my greatest drawback! Why do you say you wouldn't succeed… (Laughs) I am completely a director's actor. I am confused and lost if I don't get a good director to guide me. It is then that my performance reaches a different level. Left to myself, I will falter --- I need constant feedback! You have been part of two very high profile shows ( Sahib Bibi Aur Ghulam and Karisma-- the Miracles of Destiny) on television…but they didn't work. What happened? That is the problem with television shows. The script is never planned to perfection, anything can happen! Sahara tried, but the story floundered and above everything else, I think that the audiences did not identify with the characters. This is where the director's expertise comes in. Ravi Rai again is a master of sorts, to have managed a bank of 30 episodes and then planning much ahead. I was very disillusioned with television and was thinking of taking a sabbatical when Ravi approached me with this…it managed to excite me as an actor! What is Kashish all about? It is about choices that an individual makes and its repercussions on the people around him. What happens when one lets his emotions influence his decisions --- what happens when you let your emotions get the better of you. The storyline talks about all this. Simone plays my wife and Kitu Gidwani the woman that I fall in love with….it is a grey character…not black or white! So Kashish again is a tale of intense relationships…a mature subject that always brings with it the prospect of failure… Yes, this is true. Initially, I was skeptical, but the concept completely bowled me over. Ravi doesn't get too deep into life, his essence of life is simple and basic and that is why his serials are so poignant. So what's your take on saas-bahu serials…do you watch them? I don't even watch my own serials. Honestly, only an idiot will go back home from the sets and watch serials. But the reactions of the Indian audience surprised me initially, but again there must be something to watch out for in these serials --- television is ruthless. It would not have survived this long! Going back to films any time soon? I don't want to jump and take on too many projects. Anyway, the roles offered to me in films don't excite me too much. The exposure is not that much. There is a lot of power play. I would settle for a character role, but again one needs that kind of a caliber to pull it off.