MUMBAI:Actress Somy Ali says that she has learnt a lot from her father. However, she adds that when she was a teenager she was rebellious and wouldn’t listen much to her father.
“When I was child and a teenager, we were always butting heads as I did not have his wisdom. I was an extremely stubborn and rebellious teenager primarily due to a chaotic upbringing, therefore notoriously known for defying everything that I was told to do. Basically, I was not a fan of authoritative figures, be it my parents or anyone that held power over me. Ostensibly, I did not care for power and deemed people who had it to use it for bad not for the good of mankind,” she says,
Talking about the equation she shares now, she says, “I have Insurmountable respect for my father for the past ten years as I evolved and actually began listening to him. A great deal of respect came from repeatedly being punched in the face metaphorically with people lying and being deceitful not just with me, but in general. My father has taught me so much that I could probably write a guide book on how one should live their lives in order to avoid unnecessary turmoil and heartache. The one thing that is the biggest pet peeve of mine is people making others feel inferior than their own selves by disrespecting them and making them feel small. There is nothing worse than a person treating another condescendingly with or without reasons. It is far better to disassociate rather than get in an argument or hurt each other and I mean this not in an intimate relationship, but in life itself. My father taught me from a very young age that if you want to maintain long term relationships be it romantic, friendship or otherwise never borrow or lend money from and to anyone because money is and always has been the root cause of ruining relationships. It will always destroy relationships and cause a rift between partners, be it intimate or professional.”
She adds, “My father also ingrained so many pivotal things in me that to this day I value them. He always said that I need to stop trusting people blindly and stop telling them my plans whether they are personal or professional. I always thought for years that why is my dad always such a pessimist until I experienced incidents where I was used and taken advantage of not once, but countless times. That's when it hit me how on point my father's advice and wisdom had been when it came to throwing every iota of trust into another person and then getting burnt very badly. I know it sounds like leading a life of solitude and choosing quality over quantity when it comes to who one spends their time with, but trust me it's better to live a life walking on eggshells than being used and hurt over and over again. I am not saying that all of mankind is bad because if that were true we would all be leading a life of barbarism. But, what my father's lessons made me comprehend is so significant to my daily interactions with people that I keep my guard up at all times. One has to be living under a rock if they do not realize that as humans we always put our wants before others. It's literally this simple philosophy which carries an immense amount of depth when it comes to living a peaceful and drama free life. My father is a self made man who would sleep on pavements under street lights so he could study and do his homework. He started his career as an apprentice to a cameraman carrying a 35mm camera around various studios until one day in his early 20's he decided to find investors and hired a clerk that worked in his office as a hero which led to my father producing, writing, directing, and being the cinematographer of his very first movie. That task brought him unimaginable success and there was no looking back after that first film. I practically grew up in my dad's film studio which was on the ground floor of our house in Pakistan. My first commercial was for my father when I was just four years old.”
Somy, who now runs a US based NGO called No More Tears and helps victims of domestic violence and rape, says, “To this day everything I built, be it my NGO or working tirelessly in obtaining many degrees in psychology, journalism, film making, or even acting schools in the US is all because of my father. Another vital lesson that he taught me was to never give up on my dreams no matter how many people try to bring me down or belittle me. At this age I now know that every word my father used to make me understand about life was severely important and was only for my own good and protection. I can't imagine how it must have been for him to sleep on the streets and still obtain an education. I have the utmost respect for him and will never forget every anecdote he shared with me pertaining to his own experiences. He's my hero and I owe all my achievements to my father.”
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