MUMBAI: Actor Anuj Arora who has been part of shows like Bandini, Thodi Khushi Thode Gham, Behenein and web series Anarchy shared an intimate reflection on the role his father played in his life, revealing a complex relationship shaped by tradition and strict upbringing.
Growing up in a traditional Marwadi family, Anuj describes his childhood with his father as marked by strict discipline and fear. "We could never relate to him as I can today," he recalls. "We were always afraid of him, never comfortable around him." The fear and strictness meant that he and his siblings missed out on forming a close bond with their father during their younger years.
It was only after his father's passing that Anuj began to understand the depth of his father's good intentions and the impact he had on others. "When he passed away and I had to wind up his work, I came across many people who were very thankful and grateful to him for all his help," Anuj shares. "He was a very learned and sound craftsman, hence the demand for perfection, I believe!"
Reflecting on his father's stern ways, Anuj now empathizes with the pressures and frustrations that may have driven his father's strict demeanor. "Now that I have understood this, I am quite at peace with him," he says.
Despite the lack of a traditional father-son bond, Anuj acknowledges the strong values and self-reliance his father instilled in him and his siblings. "The values that he inculcated in us, the teachings which seemed so unfriendly and harsh at that time, have played a vital role in shaping my personality and my being," he notes.
Anuj also discusses a broader cultural trend in India, where fathers traditionally have not been deeply involved in their children's day-to-day activities. He finds hope in the changing dynamics of modern parenting, where fathers are becoming more engaged and nurturing.
The actor highlights the portrayal of father-son relationships in films, citing "Jo Jeeta Wahi Sikander" as a movie that deeply moved him. "Although there are no such similarities between my father and this character, yet their emotional journey and the bond in the film makes my heart grow fonder!"
Anuj believes in celebrating relationships every day rather than just on designated days like Father's Day. "These relationships are to be celebrated every day, not just on one particular day," he asserts. He cherishes the moments he spends reflecting on his father's life and values, finding peace and gratitude in their complex relationship.
Anuj recalls how, despite initial reservations about his career choice, his father supported his acting ambitions. "He supported me in all my endeavors by paying my fees, allowing me to take various courses in different cities and pursue my career of choice," Anuj remembers. "Had he been with us today, I hope he would be proud of my achievements and also happy for me."
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