Submitted by
TellychakkarTeam
on
Tue, 10/15/2013 - 19:02
Every year Colors’ Bigg Boss fills itself with some good-for-nothing people (most of them) who ironically become famous post their participation in the house as contestants. Don’t you think it’s time to get some real men and women on board, someone who will create a natural buzz on the basis of their star power? We draw a fictitious list of 10 people who we think will create the maximum clamour both inside and outside the house. Let’s see who they are:
“The” Arnab Goswami – India’s prime time interrogator, self proclaimed judge and the messiah of the aam aadmi, “the” Arnab Goswami is the man who prides himself in asking some tough questions to the men and women who run India. His darbar called ‘The Newshour’ starts at 9 pm every night and here you will find the bespectacled Arnab spewing venom on the politically corrupt and the morally perverse politicians. The chant ‘The nation needs to know’ is irritatingly repeated every five minutes making his victims aware that the entire India is tuned in live and they need to answer his questions. Arnab with his loud rhetoric and hawk-like eyes has managed to bulldoze even the toughest of ministers until he ran into a certain Raj Thackeray. Here the roaring Arnab turned into a mewing pussy while interviewing the firebrand Raj.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – Apart from asking his tough questions, he can also throw some light on his famed rivalry with his fellow renowned journos. But for that we need someone to grill Mr. Goswami himself. We don’t think one-eyed Bigg Boss will be up for it. Even the Boss’ baritone will be match for Goswami’s prowess with words.
Ram Kapoor - Ram Kapoor’s mere presence in Bigg Boss will assure more TVTs. If nothing, one can still be sure that women flock will be glued to their television sets just to watch their favourite Ram in action.
What he can do in Bigg Boss - Knowing Ram’s history with girls (he has confessed to being a Casanova before marriage) he could well play the romantic hero inside the house and woo the lovely ladies. But let’s see if our list will give him any pretty ladies to romance inside. And yes, given his size of the belly, we are sure he will have a tough time dealing with the food shortage. May be he will start eating the furniture or keep nibbling the mike he will be wearing (ha ha visualize him doing it and roll on the floor laughing).
Lalu Prasad Yadav – Every house needs a jester to create some light moments. We don’t mean to sound rude but if Lalu is present inside the house, he surely will give the audience some hilarious moments to cherish and talk about. Right from turning the sluggish Indian Railways into a profitable organization to allegedly filling up his own personal coffer by fraudulently withdrawing money from the government treasury for which he is currently in prison, Lalu will have a lot of topics to touch upon.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – Well, keeping in mind the fact that Lalu has considerable standing experience in running his house when Rabri Devi was the Chief Minister, Lalu could be put in charge of running the household affairs of the Bigg Boss house and take charge of the kitchen section. We, though, shudder to think on what will happen when he will come face to face with Arnab Goswami. Then Lalu, the nation would need to know more about you. (India needs an answer…Lalu…there you go, Goswami has gone bonkers again).
Narendra Modi- If there is one politician who has really conquered the public imagination in the recent times, it’s got to be Narendra Modi. Riding high on the wave of Gujarat’s development, Narendra Modi is already giving Congress and its crown prince Rahul baba sleepless nights. His presence inside the house will raise the TVTs globally.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – He can give some gyaan on development, politics and management. We think Bigg Boss would be the perfect place to quiz him about the Gujarat riots. Unlike Karan Thapar’s show, Modi won’t be able to stage a walk-out in Bigg Boss where doors remain firmly shut.
Asaram Bapu – One should read it as As-Haram Bapu. The self-styled Godman is more famous for his sexual exploits than his spiritual preaching. A man who has been accused of many sexual crimes and even murder will no doubt face some heavy barbs if put inside the house.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – With 24x7 surveillance cameras fitted in the house, Asaram will have to keep his pants firmly zipped tight. For a change, Asaram can actually teach others yoga and other spiritual things to the inmates. But then, does he know these things himself in the first place (and he has Arnab to face).
Sachin Tendulkar – Cricket will never be the same again ever since God of willow decided to say ‘good-bye.’ Time used to stand still whenever the master blaster walked out to bat. Alas! All good things have to come to an end one day.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – Sachin would be the best person to teach inmates two things. One - how to be modest and grounded even when you reach dizzying heights of popularity. Two – How to keep your calm and come up trumps even when you are subjected to the most intensifying pressure you have ever experienced in life.
Yo Yo Honey Singh – He is the most reviled musician of current times. Music directors hate him and filmmakers love him. Love him, hate him but you just cannot ignore him. Poor Vishal and Shekhar bore the brunt of the immensely popular ‘Lungi Dance’ which became synonymous with Chennai Express and Shah Rukh Khan.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – Apart from providing entertainment with is usual naach-gaana, Honey could actually tell the world why he degraded women with those despicable lyrics in his song ‘Main Hoon balatkari.’
Ratan Tata – Perhaps the most respected industrialist in the country, Ratan Tata is the man who surprised many by taking on the mantle of running a multi-million dollar conglomerate at a young age. And to say that he has done well in his career would be a great understatement. From expanding Tata into different fields to finally acquiring Corus and Jaguar, Ratan Tata proved that he is a master strategist.
What he can do in Bigg Boss – Having retired, he will have enough time in hand to teach the inmates how to conduct business in an ethical fashion and yet make money. And whatever Ratan shares would be nothing more than pearls of wisdom.
Poonam Pandey – The first question is what more can Poonam Pandey do, apart from declaring that she will go nude. The model turned actress who is known for her dare bare lingerie antics and fake ‘I will strip’ declarations could well provide the much-needed glamour element in the house.
What she can do in Bigg Boss – Well lots of things for Poonam Pandey to explore inside the house. She can shoot a new shower video, do a sexy pole dance like Sunny Leone or declare that she will go nude if so and so is voted out.
Rajnikanth – Describing Rajnikanth is easy. He is ‘The Thalaivar’ or the real Bigg Boss. His presence in Bigg Boss will end up giving the show a Pan-Asian appeal…( sorry Pan Universal he has fans in Mars too).
What can he do in Bigg Boss – Well, we feel he should be anointed as the patriarch who can moderate and prevent fights or other issues as and when they break out.
There were the top ten names, but other names that came close to making it in the final list are -
Sajid Khan – Better known as the ex- boyfriend of actress Jacqueline Fernandez, we thought Sajid Khan could occupy the slot of ‘jester’ in the house. But then we have Lalu Prasad Yadav.
Chetan Bhagat – He is the author who made India read English novels. He almost came close to making the cut but then there were other strong contenders.
Sania Mirza – The face of Indian women’s tennis, Sania could have been the glam element inside the house. But then we needed someone who would not just add the glam element but also up the ante and that’s where Poonam Pandey came in.
Sourav Ganguly – Had God not retired, Sourav Ganguly would have definitely made it to the list. The man who famously stripped off on the balcony of Lord’s could have actually shown Poonam Pandey how action speaks louder than words.
You agree with our list or not? Or you think other names could have featured in the list? Whatever be your thoughts, share with us in the comment section below.
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